Carriers of Peace

   Carriers of Peace

“Peace I leave with you. My peace I give to you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Don’t let your heart be troubled or fearful.”John 14:27

Jesus was leaving his disciples but he promised to return as their Counselor the Holy Spirit to teach them and remind them of everything he had told them. It was a personal relationship with Jesus that would show them he had come to be their peace. Together they would learn what that meant to carry His peace in a world that lacked order they would become carriers of Peace. 

At camp there was a lot of order in how it was laid out from the schedule of events to the timing of when each group would eat. But on a campus with a thousand students the order didn’t always control the chaos. It was controlled chaos but the requirements of getting students where they needed to be, meeting their physical and emotional needs all the while being in a foreign place takes a toll on leaders. As energizing as students can be, I have witnessed day four for leaders being one of the most challenging. Even the really young ones will begin to show signs of lack of sleep, the care and protection of the students, even the energy drinks can’t kick the fatigue happening within them. We all get worn down.  

I have recognized MS has a way of appearing differently than before my diagnosis. It can come challenges physically or the other way that can cause things to slow down. Not in a good sense but in a way of not being able to think clearly and form what I want to say as quickly. I can remember early on in the diagnosis and being someplace and wanting to flee and hide away when this occurred and in fact I did several times. But this time it was different in a sense of just allowing what has become a part of me to show in myself and being ok with that. After all this is my community I serve alongside weekly with so allowing those weaknesses to show the Lord has been teaching me to allow that to be part of the process. I remember sitting there in a state of just watching what was happening around me. The noises and sounds and masses of students that surrounded me just left me in a state of being still. Unmoved but peaceful. It was then my leader who sat down in  front of me and asked, “Angela, are you alright?” To which I responded, “Yes.” Then he asked, “Are you tired?” and think it was another nod I was beyond tired as well as all the other leaders. This time around the worship wasn’t on my feet, it was sitting with my arms out as I could feel the touch of others alongside me giving me that look I have come to know, “I get it and I see you.” Faith is a shared community and we become that embodied community when we display the peace of Jesus. Allowing others to see our weaknesses can build our faith together faith in this world so that others see Jesus. 

God is teaching me my peace won't feel peaceful, chaos is a state of my mind. My feelings can shift my focus off of remembering what lies within me which is the promise of His peace. Shifting my focus back on Him and taking heart knowing that is His peace present in me. Carrying that peace everywhere I go. Jesus is my Peace.

So where could you be allowing feeling to rule within your heart and mind instead of looking to Jesus to be your Peace?